A Little Out Of Hand

Dear PHC folks,

It won’t be long before we all part ways for the summer. But before we get to that, every one of us is staring down a couple of weeks of difficult reading, writing and test taking. If you’ve got the stomach read through the rest of my letter, I hope you’ll notice that though it is true that all good things come to an end, it’s also true that all bad things come to an end, too. Allow me to illustrate this point by telling a true tale that took place in western New Mexico in the winter of 1999.
My family lived in a one-room cabin in the Gila National Forest. We were taking care of cattle on the Cox Canyon lease, which is about 7,000 feet elevation. We didn’t have running water or electricity, and the only way to get water was by hauling it in a 250 gallon tank from a spring-fed water trough about seven miles away. Usually, mom and I would use five gallon buckets and dip the water out of the trough. But dad figured it was time to stop working so hard and start working smart.
The day before the ‘catastrophe’ happened, my dad went in to town and purchased a small water pump-complete with a rubber intake hose. He also bought a nice, long cloth hose (like a fire hose without a nozzle) for the output end.
The ice was five or six inches thick on the trough that morning, and the wind was cruel and sharp. Mom and dad took the feed truck-loaded with the tank and the pump-and went off to get water first thing. About two hours later, they pulled up to the cabin and mom got out, appearing an unusual shade of blue. When I got closer, I noticed the 250 gallon tank was empty…and mom was soaking wet. Dad had a ridiculous grin on his face that only flashed when mom’s back was turned. Here’s what happened:
They arrived at the trough and backed the pickup close enough for the hoses to reach, lowered the tail gate, and primed the pump. Once the ice was broken, they were ready to fill the tank. Dad stayed on the ground to man the pump and the intake hose, while moms only job was to make sure the output hose didn’t kink and the water went in like it was supposed to. The pump started. The stiff intake hose jerked as water was drawn in to it. Water filled the cloth hose and travelled quickly down it to the opening at the end. The pump sputtered, so dad reached over and adjusted the choke. The pump sped up and began drawing more water faster. Suddenly, the cloth hose was endowed with a crazed intelligence. It leapt out of the tank and slapped mom across the face. She reacted too late, and fell backward into the snow. The crazy hose proceeded to flop and writhe all around mom, who didn’t lay there long. She jumped up to lay hold of the wild hose, but her efforts were futile. She chased it only to get close enough to be blasted with ice cold water. She dived for it only to be smacked in the back of the head by it. Somewhere in the fray she lost a glove and her glasses. This violent escapade lasted for several minutes, amidst her shrill protests and shocked exclamations each time she was doused with icy spring water. After the initial panic reaction wore off, she received an epiphany: she could escape. So she hid around the other side of the truck only to have it reach underneath and soak her snow boots through. Eventually, she made it to the tailgate and shut off the pump.
And where was the would-be hero of this errand-gone-wrong? He was laughing- twitching and convulsing on the tailgate of the pickup, only an arm’s length away from the switch that could have prevented the disaster entirely. Dad was laughing so hard he couldn’t even lift the intake hose out of the trough. Mom was miserable. She was dripping wet in temperatures around 15 degrees (don’t forget the wind chill factor!). And like every feed truck on every ranch I’ve ever been on, the heater didn’t work. Mom suffered all the way home. Dad suffered too-from having to hold laughter in the whole way.
Well, I hope that story makes you chuckle. I figure it was worth telling if made you smile. Here in the next few weeks, when your assignments and tests seem to be treating you like that hose treated my mom, don’t let it dampen your spirits. It won’t be long before you’ll be able to look back and laugh about it.

Your friend,

Cheyenne